Proverbs 18:22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.
Many of you who read this are either married, in progress towards marriage, or wanting to be married. Few people do not want to be married and that is ok.
This scripture can go in so many directions but for right now we are going to focus on "findeth a wife"
I was listening to my pastor the other Sunday and the biggest thing that resonated with me was his emphasis on "When man finds a WIFE"- not a girlfriend, not some woman he met, not a female that does not know their worth, self etc but a WIFE.
So what does that mean? It does not mean that she is already married. Being married does not automatically determine that you are a wife. You can paint a picture but that does not mean you are an artist. You can walk into a school does not mean you are a student. Because you watch House does not make you a doctor.These titles have characteristics, responsibilities, and behaviors. So when the scripture reads, when a man findeth a WIFE... she is already a wife. She is already displaying the behaviors a wife would do. She already has the character that wives possess and is taking care of responsibilities God has put on her shoulder.
I realized that I was made to be a wife and a great one at that! :) I was a wife before my husband married me.
The couple of years of years leading up to my marriage I knew I wanted to be married and was destined to be married. I was in a relationship with a man that was not going anywhere and I knew that. Funny thing is I told him that I want to be married and if I meet someone that has that potential then I am going to pursue that opportunity and he was like I understand. When I met my husband we talked and upfront we both were like I am not dating just to be dating I want it to result into marriage. So we were preparing ourselves. I know I was. I started getting everything in order. Job, saving money, deepening my relationship with Christ, preparing for the future, I actually knew he was going to be my husband, I do not know how specifically but little confirmations.
For those that are seeking marriage and a biblical one, what are you doing to get yourself prepared? To be honest I do not think you are ever 100% prepared but you can be 100% ready to take on the challenge.
Things to think about:
- Relationship with Christ- How is it? What will happen to it when you get in a relationship with some amazing person? Will you focus your attention more on the person or stayed on God? Will God only be necessary when things are not going smoothly? Will you compromise your faith and beliefs because they do not believe the same? Take time to think about this and create a non negotiable list.
- Who are you and what do you have to offer to the table? - Marriage is let's just say it a business there are two individuals that want to merge to create one large more impressive business. What is it about you that no one can touch. Are you still doing the same things as 5 years ago? Have you grown as a person, in your career, etc? What sets you apart from other people. Is it your personality? How you treat people? What are you bringing to the table? What assets tangible and intangible do you have that can provide more substance to this relationship? It is so good to look at yourself in the overall big picture- are you bringing gain or shame? What about...
- Finances- Are you in debt? What is in your bank account? Are there going to be creditors after you? Your career/job is it where you want to be financially? DO you even like where you work? If you hate your job your emotions and feeling lead to behaviors and can mess up a relationship...
- Are you a HAPPY POSITIVE person? - I personally cannot stand being around a depressed complaining all the time man or woman. If you do not like your situation then change it. Make sure when you enter into a new relationship you are on a good positive foundation. Make sure you are emotionally, mentally, spiritually and physically ready.
- Stand your ground- What are your beliefs? What are your values? What are your non-compromising, nonnegotiable? What standards do you have that are too high or not relevant to your situation? You cannot honestly be living below poverty and expect someone to just come and sweep you up off your feet and take care of you, movies are not real! What about your kids? Or theirs? Family situation for both?
So after all the thinking and contemplating, are you a wife? Are you a husband? Are there some things that you could work on to be an added asset and not a subtractor or divider in this area? Women you can look all you want for a man but it has to be him that realizes you are a wife.
Tell me your thoughts and opinions.
Peace and Blessings